The Emotional Side of Scoliosis
When most people hear the word scoliosis, they picture X-rays, curves measured in degrees, braces, appointments, and maybe a quick “That must be uncomfortable.” What often gets left out of the conversation is the emotional weight that comes along for the ride.
Because scoliosis is not just something you have.
It’s something you live with.
And yes, sometimes that emotional load can feel heavier than the backpack you’re not supposed to wear on one shoulder anymore.
More Than a Curve on an X-Ray
Scoliosis can quietly affect how someone sees themselves, how safe they feel in their body, and how they show up in the world. For kids, teens, and even adults, it can stir up a whole mix of emotions, often all at once.
Some of the most common ones I hear in therapy sound like this:
“Why is my body different?”
“Everyone is staring at my back.”
“I don’t feel like myself anymore.”
“I should be grateful it’s not worse… so why do I still feel upset?”
“I don’t want to talk about it, but I also don’t want to feel so alone.”
If any of these sound familiar, you’re not being dramatic.
You’re being human.
Anxiety, Uncertainty, and the Mental Load
One of the hardest parts of scoliosis is the unknowns.
Will the curve change?
Will it get worse?
Will treatment work?
Will I need surgery?
What if I do everything right and still struggle?
That constant uncertainty can keep the nervous system on high alert. Over time, this can show up as anxiety, irritability, difficulty sleeping, or feeling mentally exhausted even on “good” days.
And here’s something important to know:
Even when pain is mild or managed, the anticipation of pain or progression can be just as stressful.
The Invisible Grief No One Talks About
There can also be a quiet sense of grief with scoliosis.
Grief for:
The body you thought you’d have
The activities that feel harder now
Feeling carefree in your own skin
Not having to think about your spine at all
This grief doesn’t mean you’re negative or ungrateful. It means you’re processing a real loss. And grief doesn’t need permission to exist.
Body Image, Mirrors, and Changing Relationships With Your Body
Let’s talk about mirrors for a second. Mirrors can be neutral, friendly, or downright rude depending on the day.
Scoliosis can change how someone relates to their body, especially during adolescence when bodies are already changing at an unfair speed. Asymmetry, braces, scars, posture differences, or chronic discomfort can lead to:
Increased self-consciousness
Avoiding certain clothes or activities
Feeling “behind” peers
Comparing bodies more than ever
And while people might say things like “You can’t even tell!” (usually trying to be helpful), it can sometimes feel invalidating.
A Quick Moment of Humour (Because We Need It)
If scoliosis had a personality, it would be that uninvited guest who rearranges your furniture, comments on your posture, and refuses to leave… but somehow expects you to “stay positive.”
You’re allowed to laugh at it sometimes.
You’re also allowed to be annoyed by it.
Both can exist at the same time.
I recently had a client share with me that the lesion in her brain has a theme song and it’s Anti-Hero by Taylor Swift.
You Are Not Weak for Struggling
One of the biggest myths I see is the idea that struggling emotionally means you’re not coping “well enough.”
In reality:
Feeling frustrated does not mean you’re failing
Feeling sad does not mean you’re giving up
Needing support does not mean you’re weak
It means you’re responding to something that affects your body, identity, and future all at once.
That’s a lot for anyone.
Supporting the Emotional Side of Scoliosis
Addressing the emotional side doesn’t mean focusing on scoliosis all the time. It means learning how to:
Build a kinder relationship with your body
Reduce anxiety around uncertainty
Feel understood and validated
Separate who you are from what your spine is doing
Develop coping tools that actually fit your life
Support can come in many forms: therapy, peer support, journaling, education, or simply having language for what you’re feeling instead of bottling it up.
A Final Thought
Scoliosis is part of your story, but it is not the whole story.
Your worth is not measured in degrees.
Your strength is not defined by how quiet your emotions are.
And you don’t have to navigate this alone.
If this blog made you feel a little more seen, a little less alone, or even just made you exhale for a moment, then it did its job.
And if you’re struggling emotionally with scoliosis, that doesn’t mean something is wrong with you.
It means you’re paying attention to yourself, and that is a powerful place to start.
💚
If the emotional side of scoliosis has been weighing on you or your child, support is available.
At STC Therapy, I work with teens, adults, and parents navigating the emotional and mental health side of scoliosis with compassion, evidence-based strategies, and real understanding.
Learn more about working together or book a virtual session here.